#how to process stress

[chez-cinnamon]

Nervous Caine my beloved, you draw him so well

Thank you!! Get very used to seeing him that way-

Despite being an AI, Caine displays a lot of anxiety and self deprecating symptoms, and being an AI, he does NOT know how to handle these feelings healthily. Also since I HC him as autistic, or displaying symptoms akin to autism, it makes understanding these negative emotions much harder, as well as expressing them.

Thankfully, he finds comfort in someone who really understands his feelings-

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Another year has passed, and with it the opportunity to reflect back on all that has happened. While my growth was not as dramatic as last year, I can still see lots of positive change.

I'll never have enough ways to say thank you for all the love and support you have given me this year. On to 2025!

(2023 summary here!)

[hmscritters]

[ 62 ]

Some critters I made on Wigglypaint!

Due to color limitations Soul doesn't have all of his patterns, but I think they all turned out cute.

[doe-eye-oswald]

'Characters watching the show'-type situation except it's just the incredibly dangerous whacky stunts conan pulls on a regular basis (including the movies) being shown to people that aren't in the know.

Oh you think the child is staying over at the professors TOO BAD he's following a murderer!!! Ran is looking for him bc he's run off again SIKE he's chasing a car on the highway on his janky little skateboard!!! Oh thank god this high stakes case got somehow resolved WHAT'S THIS it's conan confronting the suspect by kicking a football unnaturally hard!!!! Thankfully we all escaped the burning building WHELP there's conan running back into it!!! We need to evacuate the premises bc there's a bomb WHOOPS there's conan defusing it!!! Where's the child gone now WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT it's said child jumping of an exploding building using his suspenders as a jumping rope while being actively shot at HAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

At no point is it mentioned that Conan is anything more than a smart six year old.

[feng-shui71]

I want Jordan to receive headpats. I feel like Wesker would bestow her the finest headpats. Like he just goes up to her and she's like HUH and then, instead of anything remotely threatening, he tilts his head, puts his hands on the sides of hers and lets his hands card through her beautiful hair, almost reverent - barely restrained love, expression unreadable but actions unmistakable.

Can confirm he gives the best headpats, though they’re few and far between.

[qoldenskies]

The boys getting CC!Donnie cute clothes as a gift

they'd have no idea how to coordinate his wardrobe because they do not have the eye for fashion that donnie does, so i feel like this would come in the form of having to be extremely eagle-eyed about everything he so much as Glances at for more than a split second because when they asked him he got Weirdddd. he had fun when they got trapped by hypno though which is probably where the idea came from in the first place

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

hello hello!! your fic pez dispenser debris brings me immense joy. and i wanna know if the other nejire and tamaki will be showing up. id love to see their reactions to fucking #leku. and i’d love to hear your thoughts on them in general if you have any to spare. the big three have such a fun dynamic to me.

Tamaki will appear. I’m not fully settled on Nejire. In my mind, she moved to Kyoto not long after she graduated but keeps in very close touch (if you read the battle of Yokohama posts, she was there during that fight because she was visiting Her Boys and insisted on a Big Three Sleep Over, which is why the three of them were together when Izuku called to begin with). They have a group chat that she started blowing up when the Leku news hit. All of them are painfully, violently aware of the fact Mirio is absolutely not dating Izuku and also of the fact that Mirio’s probably close to drowning himself at the mere thought.

I do really like the idea of the Big Three having been sort of outcasts before they were the big three, and I think canon supports this reading. They were all sort of the weird kids. They were each other’s only friends. After they started rising in the ranks, they became more popular, but they all consider the others their main people.

I also like the idea that they became the Big Three because of each other.

They were friends before they were the big three. And it’s not a coincidence that the big three were all already friends. They pushed each other to grow in their skills and surpass everyone else.

The reason why they haven’t been more present in pez is actually the same reason why I didn’t have them open a hero agency together: they all need to grow separately from the others for a bit.

Like. Here’s Mirio, with two very skilled and experienced heroes at his side, waiting for Izuku to graduate so he can start his agency. Why not go into business with the friends he’s already been fighting with for years?

I see the Big Three as people who all, for one reason or another, decided that they needed to learn how to be strong on their own at the start of their career.

Take Tamaki. He’s childhood friends with Mirio. He was briefly referenced in one of the tumblr posts as one of Mirio’s staunchest advocates after he lost his Quirk. So why isn’t he heroes with Mirio?

Well, he sort of is. He’s got a mutual support agreement with him.

Time to derail into my favorite topic: the economic models underpinning fictional societies. As you can probably guess I’m great at parties.

Mutual support agreements are contractual devices that I came up with in response to the convoluted economic structure of heroics compensation I discussed a few posts ago. In that post, I discussed independent/underground v. agency models with respect to public compensation and how I think that there’s an impossibly complicated matrix that grants heroes portions of the local budget based on their statistics. Briefly, I discussed how that calculation would cause conflict with big name heroes taking credit for their sidekicks’ work because agencies would necessarily need to be counted as one entity for the purposes of public funding.

What happens when multiple agencies are involved in the same incident?

As a reminder, the reason why they need to assign credit for a bust to one individual is because agencies are funded as a whole. This is a grant system that’s meant to be more than just about paying a salary—the government is providing funds meant to go towards an office space, supplies, everything. You could not give everyone in an agency public funding separate checks under that model. Public funding is made out to the agency as a whole and it’s up to the agency as to how to use it. But if you have six people from the same agency who all register the exact same take down because they all participated—well now you’ve got the one job reported six times over for the same filing entity. That’s going to horrifically skew the funding calculation. The government’s paying for the same bust six times over and you just incentivized hero agencies to send their people all to do the same job because it pays the same to have six guys stop one criminal as it does to have six guys stop six different criminals separately.

But hey—sometimes it’s a six guy job. That would more appropriately be considered an enhancement to a job’s relative difficulty than it would be to giving credit for a takedown. After all, the same job could require “six guys” or “one All Might.” If you focus on the number of heroes an agency uses in a job than you do on how difficult that job actually is, then you’re inadvertently penalizing better heroes because Mid Tier Agency needed six guys to handle what you did on your own, but since they needed six whole guys they get paid more for the same thing that you could do solo.

But the reason for this one man credit structure is because you’re getting one check for the government per agency. But what about when heroes from different agencies team up? Big Hero is not sharing a government funding check with Even Bigger Hero, and there’s absolutely no way that every single team up is just fucking pro bono for everyone but one guy. That’d make it impossible. So the same job would have to get counted multiple times when it involved different heroic entities.

The fact that you were teamed up instead of solo would go into the relative value calculation of each independent job. You get the full pot if you’re solo, but if you’re sharing the load, you’re sharing the credit. But at the same time, how much credit you get would also have to be determined on a case by case basis. Like. A hero that evacuated three civilians contributed to a fight, but they in no way should get equal credit and compensation to All Might, who fought the entire villain team solo.

So say Big Hero Agency and Bigger Hero Agency are doing a team up for the good of Japan. Big Hero Agency initiated the investigation, did most of the legwork, and invited Bigger Hero Agency onto the job. However, when it came to actually fighting, Bigger Hero Agency absolutely carried the day. Big Hero Agency would have been dust if Bigger Hero Agency hadn’t been there.

Who deserves more credit and compensation?

There is probably some kind of governmental dispute/appeal board to settle disputes about compensation, but like. As someone who does government work. The government’s absolute favorite thing to say is “we are not babysitting you, fucking figure it out like big boys.” They’ll have a way to resolve disputes, but they will also heavily incentivize voluntary agreement amongst the parties.

Planned team ups probably have legal working shit out ahead of time. Spontaneous team ups or heroes stealing each other’s fights a la Mount Lady and Kamui Woods in the pilot are probably the biggest headaches.

But what about heroes that are always teaming up? They’re your go to. Your homeboy. The daredevil to your Spider-Man. You don’t file your paperwork together, but you’re still always fighting side by side. Are you renegotiating who gets credit for what in every single little fight?

Fuck no. That’s a huge pain in the ass. Enter the mutual support agreement. It’s a contract that has a bunch of clauses meant to help streamline deciding who gets credit for what and resolve disputes before they happen.

You wouldn’t just want this for compensation purposes. Say Big Hero commits the hero equivalent of police brutality. Now he’s being sued. He’s apparently not that big of a hero as the name implies, because he’s got no fucking money. You want more money for your client, so you need a deeper pocket to pull from. At the time of the incident, he was working with Bigger Hero Agency. They’re not the same agency, but it was Bigger Heroes bust, and they work together all the time. Big Hero is basically one of Bigger Heroes employees hidden behind a different corporate structure. Should Bigger Hero be liable for Big Hero?

That’s a big fucking court case that can be headed off at the pass by the fact that Bigger Hero put indemnification and liability clauses in its mutual support agreement. There’s a lot of issues that would arise from the practice of heroics that you’d want to govern ahead of time with a contract. So you sign a mutual support agreement.

But the silly little fake tumblr post also said they weren’t popular and mostly agencies like Idaten used them. So why is that?

Frankly, because it’s not very worth agencies while to team up with other agencies on the regular. The system doesn’t incentivize it.

If you have all of your own sidekicks on a job, you can steal credit from them. The same is not true for heroes from other agencies. You get more public funding if you staff a job with all people from your agency instead of having part of the credit go to other agencies. And you get to stand in front of the cameras and say “Big Hero Has Saved The City Again” instead of having to say “Thank You To Our Dear Friends From Bigger Hero Agency Who Carried This Team.”

Idaten is the exception because, well. It doesn’t care. Idaten’s priority is cultivating the necessary talent and teamwork needed to get the job done. It doesn’t care if it has to go outside of the agency for that. Fuck, Tensei’s canonically willing to reach out to vigilantes. Its genuine focus is saving people, so it goes against the grain of what the system incentivizes.

Mirio and Tamaki have a mutual support agreement. They’re out working together so much that Fat Gum’s agency approved an overall disliked mechanism to facilitate their team ups. They are heroes together—so why aren’t they in an agency together?

I think Tamaki wanted to spend his first year in heroics forcing himself out of his comfort zone so he’d improve. Fat Gum will force him in front of the cameras. He’s focusing on learning how to communicate effectively with the public and with the media, and Fat Gum has the sort of resources and infrastructure where Tamaki can devote the time to learning that and improving. If he was in an agency with Mirio, he’d use Mirio as a crutch to hide from something he genuinely wants to improve in. Fat Gum forces him to grow.

Mirio himself sort of had to go independent. For one, he and Izuku decided to start their agency not too long after Mirio got his license. It was before Mirio debuted. Izuku had just finished his first year. No one knew who either of them were, and they had no clue just how famous they’d both become before Izuku graduated.

They both figured they’d be a couple of nobody heroes with a dinky little agency right out the gate of Izuku’s graduation and were sort of genuinely excited at the prospect. They’d just be heroes together, which is all they wanted. They’d figured no one would give a shit about them until well after they started their agency and started working and that Izuku would have 0 offers to work elsewhere because he wasn’t even going to apply to agencies. So Mirio decided he’d stay independent until Izuku graduated so he wouldn’t be tied up in an agency contracts and they could just start fresh.

The other reason is that most agencies wouldn’t touch Mirio with a ten foot pole because he was Quirkless, and even with the ones that would, he suspected they’d sideline or coddle him because he was Quirkless. Being independent meant he could do whatever the hell he pleased. So he bought the Mirio Mom Van and, for a brief, glorious moment, convinced All Might to supervise their bullshit so he could start going on jobs with Izuku (students have to be supervised by heroes with a teaching license, which he wouldn’t be eligible for for the first three years of his career, except in exigent circumstances. He couldn’t have Izuku as an intern himself but All Might sure could). For a few beautiful weeks it was just Mirio, Izuku, and fucking All Might in the Mirio Mom Van going on stakeouts, all wearing the world’s stupidest mustaches. The UA internship program revoked permission for this arrangement not long after it started formally out of concerns for the legality of this arrangement since All Might was no longer an active duty hero, informally because All Might, Izuku, and Mirio is the stupidest and most reckless combination fucking imaginable and they are killing Aizawa from the stress they are killing him. So now Mirio works alone while he waits for Izuku to be fully licensed.

Nejire I kind of see as someone who moved away from her hometown right out of the gate of graduation but visited home very frequently, which is why she moved to Kyoto after graduation but was having a fucking sleepover at Mirio’s place when Yokohama happened. She takes the bullet train back at least once a month and spends the weekend bumming on Mirio or Tamaki’s couch. I think she wanted to see who she was away from home and there’d never be a better time to do it. I also think she’ll move back so that way she can work more fully with Her Boys one day, but wanted to push herself out of the familiar first.

All of the trio’s reasons for not working together quite yet are mutable, to be clear. Tamaki just wanted the experience early in his career or he knew he’d never learn the public relation skills he wanted to get. Nejire also just wanted the experience somewhere else before she put down real roots somewhere and is liable to move back to be with her friends and family. And Mirio’s on the verge of opening his own agency, so he doesn’t have to worry about getting sidelined by his boss anymore or getting tied up in a bad contract.

[good-beanswrites]

Any toxic hcs for the milgram prisoners + es? pain bc we gotta know toxic things our favs do or say….

LMAO this made me laugh so much – we love when our faves suck ass 👏👏👏 I feel we’ve gotten a clear picture of how the prisoners react to people they don’t like and their reactions to negative emotions, so I tried to find toxic things they’d do when interacting with/arguing with people they actually do like lol. Some are based on specific canon details and some I’ll admit are just hcs/vibes I’ve always had about them >:3

When making friends, Haruka messes with their personal belongings. It’s never anything huge, but he’ll enter cells in secret to pocket possessions, hide things, and occasionally ruin things. He likes that the owner has to come find him to get it back, find it, or is forced to spend more time with him now that their other activity can’t be used. Even if he’s scolded for it, he takes that as a win and it doesn’t stop him from doing it again.

Yuno likes things her way, and is willing to go behind people’s backs to get it. She always gets what she wants at the end of the day. She’ll communicate well the first time, but if the answer isn’t satisfactory then she sneaks around to change the situation in secret. She employs bribery and blackmail, always giggling and saying it’s not that big of a deal so it’s difficult to accuse her seriously.

(One definition of toxic behavior is something that “creates an environment of stress, discomfort, and emotional turmoil” and that’s basically every confrontation that comes out of Fuuta’s mouth LMAO. So aside from the obvious,) he always assumes the worst of people no matter what a kind gesture it may be. He believes every compliment and favor is just an attempt at manipulating someone. He takes even the most well-intentioned statements as hidden attacks and insults, and reacts accordingly without telling the other.

Muu is very touchy, and doesn’t listen when people shy away from her. She’s constantly trying to fix people’s outfits and their hair by grabbing things, or guiding their hand to showing them the correct way to do something, or taking things she thinks people are offering to her right from their grasp. She gets really offended when people do the same to her, and explains it’s different because she knew what she was doing when she helped, and they don’t. 

Shidou always assumes he’s the smartest in the room. Though he’s not openly arrogant about it, he’ll politely ignore advice from others and steamroll conversations because he’s just so sure of his own plan. Even when apologizing or admitting to be wrong, it’s clear he thinks there was a very intelligent reason for being wrong rather than it being a messy emotional mistake. Whenever he argues, he stays calm and has this patronizing look, as if he’s talking to someone much younger and dumber than himself.

Mahiru is a busybody. She thinks she’s capable of solving other people’s problems that they 1. Don’t need her to fix, 2. Don’t want her to fix, 3. There isn’t actually a problem, she just misunderstood. She hears one person venting about another and she immediately goes to the other party to tell them and try to work things out. She believes people have unrequited feelings and goes to wild lengths to set them up together. She announces things that were confided to her in secret, thinking it will help to get it off people’s chest. 

Kazui can get into bouts of “learned helplessness” with his imagined age. He’ll assume he’s too old to get the joke/reference; it’s too much to explain to him, don’t trouble yourself; he can’t relate to your pain; you wouldn’t get his joke/reference/pain because it’s from a different time, etc. He acts like he’s doing a favor and saving people the trouble of talking to him, but it’s clear he’s just not putting in the work to relate to others and offer them a simple kind word. 

(I don’t know if a 12yo can be “toxic” per se, but) Amane is perfectly attuned to what others will respond to when she tries to argue. She may seem like she’s preaching in vain to people who won’t listen, but she definitely knows the right words/tone/framing to use to get the reaction she’s looking for while coming out of the situation looking innocent and well-behaved. Sometimes she says things knowing full well they won’t work, but if she stays calm and “oblivious” while the adult gets worked up, it’s difficult for people to blame her for any outburst.

Mikoto assumes others feel the same as him, and will charge ahead with uncomfortable plans and conversations. He doesn’t see personal questions as invasive or pushy because he assumes everyone else has a perfectly scripted normal-life response like him. He thinks everyone will eventually get used to being thrown into the social spotlight because he gets nervous sometimes but then enjoys it. He offers unsolicited advice, as well as unsolicited criticism, because he can’t imagine anyone wanting an “unstable” life like they’re living now. 

Kotoko feels above certain conversations and arguments, and will simply walk out instead of talking things out. Even when stuck in a tight room, she’ll just shut down and stay silent rather than have a tough conversation. She claims she won’t dignify the other with an answer, but it’s clear she just doesn’t want to face the discomfort of the topic. 

Es refuses to talk, in general – even neutral or good information is difficult for them to communicate. Sometimes they assume everyone else is observing the situation as closely as them (so they’re all on the same page), and sometimes they just think it’s not the others’ business (so it’s okay the other is left in the dark). They don’t talk to the prisoners about each other – even when serious issues are revealed in interrogations, Es doesn’t pass it along to get any help. They don’t speak a word when they’re making plans, so others end up doing things and making their own plans that conflict and make Es angry at their disruption. They don’t speak up about interpersonal situations – good or bad – and leave it up to the other party to bring up topics.

[july-19th-club]

i have no mouth and i must scream speech but for about insomnia hate hate hate let me tell you how much i have come to hate being awake

[worrywarwrites]

ohohohohohoho you know how I used the "it's all coming together" meme a while back? YEAH.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

At the start of this project all I wanted was to 'learn how to draw' using comics as a medium and the MDZS audio drama as inspiration.

I've come *very* far from making simple, 3 panel black and white comics, and I truly do intend to go even further. Thank you to everyone who cheered me on throughout 2023, it has been an incredible year in so many ways I never could have imagined. I look forwards to drawing throughout 2024 B*)

(2024 summary here)

[chocolate-eye-candy]

A transition in my life has occurred and is still going

[iguessitsjustme]

Something I find fascinating about Wandee Goodday is that no one has kissed yet (I know Ye and Cher have kissed but...) Like not a full on make out session despite having an established couple in the show that they could be using to show us kisses. But we get no kiss sex scenes from Yak and Dee and soft, somewhat chaste scenes from Ye and Cher. We all know both couples are fucking. But the lack of kisses where normally the show would have one couple more active in that department tells me how important kissing is to this story.

Dee has stated that it's silly but he doesn't want to kiss unless he loves that person and is serious with them. But the entire show is respecting the no kiss rule which tells me that it's not silly. The entire show is respecting Dee's boundary here. And yes, Yak and Dee have come so close to kissing so many times, but they haven't. Dee has always pushed him away and Yak has always respected it when he does.

It makes me wonder what's going to happen once the main couple does eventually lock lips. Will that open the floodgates? Will the audience get to see both couples kissing then? Or will it continue to withhold that specific moment of intimacy. There's something the show is saying about the expected parts of intimacy being taken for granted and also deserving of privacy and that's up to the people in the relationship.

Kissing can be an act of love and desire, but what the show is saying is that it is not a requirement for those things. I can be completely talking out of my ass here, but something about this is really sitting with me. Not only do we get Plakao as ace representation, someone who wants a partner to cherish and be cherished without sexual expectations, but we also get the show reinforcing the ideas that love comes in all forms with so many different acts and different people are comfortable with different things. And all of that is okay. And all of those boundaries are worthy of being respected. Regardless of societies expectations for what it means to be in a relationship and be physical, whatever is right for you is right and isn't that just beautiful?

[necrotic-nephilim]

so. now that my accidental hiatus is over and i've rattled myself free of the grave, i just want to give a general update on this blog and where i'm at with it. because i do love this blog and want to post, but when i made this blog, the intention of it was canon-based metas and discussions around DC that were often ship-focused, but also just generally my opinions on the fandom. and of course i enjoy rolling around in the filth and having a lot of sexual/dead dove posts on main, but it did overwhelm me a bit when that became my entire blog and i got more asks than i could keep up with.

so in the future, i think i'm going to stagger how fast i answer asks and try to find a healthy mix of my own metas, dead dove shipposting, and whatever else i want to put here. and while i don't want to close asks because i invite discourse my way, i do have to say i will be much slower to answering them. sometimes we will be whores on main, sometimes we will be analyzing this fandom and it's source material on main. who is to say. but either way, we're back and no one can get rid of me.

[moeblob]

WOW it's way later than I planned to just be finishing art but here we go! I did manage!

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

save them tbh